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Milton's favorite farmer shows he's no dummy, takes himself a wife

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The man and lady of the house, er porch. (Lebanon Voice photo)

MILTON - "In the spring a young man's fancy lightly turns to thoughts of love."

And so it was for one young man from Milton as he struck out last month in search of his soul mate.

Many locals were concerned for his well-being when they saw he'd left his perch on the porch at 789 White Mtn. Hwy, where they'd seen him lounging hundreds if not thousands of times.

But, not to worry. He just needed a few more leaves stuck in his chest, and now he's good as new.

That's right, folks. That dummy at 789 White Mountain Highway is not only back and better than ever. He got hisself a wo-man.

"He found a girlfriend, and now they're married," declared Corrie Woodbury, who's lived in the house and cared for (he has no name, and now neither does she) the mannequin for a long time.

She said she took the guy off her front porch last month when he began to get a little frumpy looking with much of his leaf stuffing lost over the winter.

When he came back he had a woman, a fetching well-endowed lass with long dark tresses dressed in jeans and a pink pullover.

"They're farmers, they eat well," mused Woodbury, whose father-in-law, Richard Woodbury, of Milton, created the pair.

Actually Woodbury said the pair has quite a history. When she first moved into the house about seven years ago, they had a guy and gal sitting on the porch, but they were soon stolen.

"We never got the girl back, but my husband saw some post on Facebook that said, 'Whoever threw that mannequin head at my house we know who you are.' So my husband got a hold of the guy and told him it was his and asked if he could come get him and we got him back. But we never found the woman."

She said over the years they try to update his look on a holiday or seasonal basis. In the fall he might have a rake in one hand and a beer in the other. Over the Memorial Day weekend, he held an American flag.

Woodbury said she knows he's popular, because "a lot of people honk their horns when they go by.

"What I don't like is when they toss empty beer cans at him though," she added.

So what's next for the no-name couple?

"Maybe kids," Woodbury mused.

Wonder if they'll fight over names.

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